To the 6 of u the picts of ur unglam photos are out hahahahaha...
Thanks for coming to my church... Most love u all...

Everyone has been askin me not to be emo even the original emo-er Angie...
Yepps I'm not, I'm startin to isolate myself from the world. Hatin myself even more..
Knowin I've changed super lotssss.
N come on la, to the ppl i see 2 days per week, I can see it.
ITS PRINTED ON UR FACE... tat jialing has changed...
I've tried to change things back, thru prayin, worshippin, singin, sincerely repent, i did everythin but still i'm like tt.. Tryin my best to make a diff...Like we always sang, but nth happens...
*...deleted...*
I'm so out of my mind... I've let satan slipped in, I dunno how to turn back to HIM, its hard. I dun wanna cheat HIS feeling anymore, everytime i repent HE throw HIS lovin arms to me but when I feel a slight of HIS touch I drifted away super far away... I'm useless... I'm back to my oldself aft so long, ever since JemYap asked me to stop it till Sunday... I can't feel HIS pressence... I want HIM more... I need HIM. Anyone???

Things is happening...
I admit i started it... So yea its either it continue n makes me more irritating n disobeyin or watever its gonna happen... PUBLIC APOLOGY IS NEEDED...


I"M SORRY BRINDHA!!! For letting u suffer all this pain, I know its super unfair to u...
Yepps I want u to bond more with them, they r 100times better than me. They knows how to entertain u. Nv like me, being with me is a sufferin i always says tt to all my frens cos I'm agreein to it.I'm a boring kinda person to be frank.. ITS THE FACT. Seeing u with them I'm much happier cos i can see the source of enjoyment is from them. All i want is U to be happy. I can't always talk n eneterain u which makes me even useless... Anw just leave me out:) alright... Luv u as i always do... Giving my best bro to u, n giving my wonderful daughter to my bro...

Back to my quietness.... HOOORAY!!!

thanks(:
sorry):
isolation)':
truefrens(?)
speechless......
quietness...shhhhh....
words i found in 940's current dictionary...
I wanna see the picts for the telematch... will send to u all when i recieve it:)
byes....

To both brinz n ckw...
Stop laughin at tt dramatic line of mine ok!!!grrrrr...nae~
I purposely put tt one lo... lol...
Anw its good to be alone too(:Aiya u 2 will not understandXP!!!
I WANT TO BE ALONE!!! shut up!!!Mouth zipped...

Went home with madeline han di ping today:D
n her cute fren... haha at last someone is cuter than her...
Disturbed her the moment we met... She is so nice to disturb she knows how to pei he me...lol...
Non stop chattin n disturbin... She n her "4yrs of frenship hor hor hor..." YayaWateva...-.-"

Shall talk abt sat, went to meet yingjie n aunty yixuan. First time knowin aunty yixuan:)
Glad to know her...(: She say i dun looks like singaporean??? From cold country, thot of ckw n his welcome to beijing... Then went tq, watch madagascar2, TingEn only rmb the line "i've got good news n bad news. Good news is we r landin IMMEDIATELY, bad news is we r CRASH LANDIN..." Hahaha n the "Thank you again for choosin air penguin"hahaha... Sunday was my blur day...Super careless, can forget things in like 5mins...Wat to do i got sstm...blame me...

Wat on earth am i thinkin this few days? Super irritatin...Can't just shut up yea...thks...

Today was supposed to be bored bored n still bored, but the red bull drink make me super hyper-.-for no reason... Dun even know y i drink it, cos i'm thirsty?
Maybe, with my filled to the brim water bottle rite infront of me...
Can't do pe, sadis... Cos just recover then then ...~~~
Brinz gave ckw doreamon fan n strip, i think out of all his presents doreamon is the most hahas...
Thot we will be goin to the equipment store but cos some got SC so cancelled,
1 for all all for one(: yea man... No one is left behind...
Then end up in demo kitchen to have some class bondin.... Talk n laughssss...
After tt went for lunch, and almost all went to land....
I didn't as usual, sorry guys can't, broke alr... Money dun grow on trees neither it falls frm sky...
Hope u all understand but still sorry...
I wonder y i seems like there's super many things for me to appologise... Am i tt bad? Ya, most prob if not i wouldn't needa say sorry so many timeS... Sigh...
Apologise so much yet i dunno how to apologise to the one who seated at the throne waitin to forgive... sighs.... ????Wat am i thinkin man????
While i'm in the train was all alone haha i deserve itXp ... While walkin home a wind blew n all i have in mind was ...all alone...

Thanks to all who sent "get well soon" msgs(:
esp to ckw n brinz with all ur everyday msgs...
Haha really needa thank u 2(:brought smiles to my day.
MC for 3days, ma'am fell sick too, class cancelled on tt 3 days too.
Praise GOD. Was super worried tt I'll miss lesson... yepps i did IKP...
Thank GOD good tt the notes they copied were short...
Its all by HIS great work, praise GOD again hahas... I will nv stop praisin...

Being "girlish" is nv my type, though ALOT tried to change me, but i'm still like tt.
Wanna say ThankU n I'm sorry... I will try harder to change...

First day of lettin tt broken frenship handle by GOD,
hmmm somehow got a slight movement... Yea praise GOD...
Trustin n believein tt it will happen again... Will keep on prayin...
Let HIM handle this matter FULLY... Amen?Amen!

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!! to all mothersssss:D
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! Kokway n Yuling...
Sorry ckw can't go Angie's house to celebrate with u all...
My mum fell sick so gotta stay at home to take care of her ytd,
cos bro went tuition at grandma house with nich...
Do housework, read GOD's word n listen songs...
Can't wait to go to church to meet YingJie for some prayer session...
I'm so excited to go back to the same old days where i'm with some bros n sis in Christ to learn n to do some sharin...
I learnt ALOT from her ytd, Thks Yingjie:)
The writin out of GOD's word n calmin down of heart is useful man!
Now GOD is trying to make everything clear in me. I gets to relate n link everythin I know, see, hear n all the knowledge GOD gave me to HIM. GOD plans everything for HIS purpose, HE makes no mistake! All I needa do is to surrender my all to HIM , be honest n faithful. Start to cheer for HIM for HE is the one who lives n control me. Praise HIM, worship HIM for HE is worthy for our praise! Putting HIM as my PRIORITY, SPIRIT controls my SOUL then my BODY(flesh) shall do wat is commanded...I trust u LORD, U can do it! I will not hesitate nor doubt but keep praisin n say AMEN! to all works done... The victory is ours, but its is said thru grace The war is HIS but the victory is ours. AMEN! THANKYOU FATHER! LOVEYOULORD! Draw me closer to YOU!
I know wat does it means to "bringin ur heart to the kitchen"(FOCUS)
& also "Let GOD works in us"(stand back, & see wat the LORD will do, cheer for HIM keep praisin HIM, fill our hearts with praises...)
Today went to church, thks to YingJie again for she told me how to conquer the situation i'm facin, true enough we didn't meet. ThankU FATHER i start to see how u work... Praise U again!
JingWen n our marryin thingy haha n SiXian gets jealous oh... dun be sad... hahaha
Can't stop laughin n smilin when i see them(:Luv all of u manz!
Haha i think some might not understand wat i'm bloggin abt rite... its alright someday u will i, think... I'm sick too, super afraid I can't go to sch tmr... LORD, I rest in U!!U shall take the rest..

Today was filled with weird weird feelins... Weird me...Ran on the track mill for pe woohooos aft so long...Kokway , brinz wanna play ping pong but end up others playin hahas,wasn't with them for i dunno y... Reasonless...(no such word)Aft pe, went canteen too think of where to go for lunch while waitin for some slowpokesssss...Then decided to go to City Vibe, Kokway keep on sayin the chi ver. i was like huh?Anw we went there for both lunch n land...
Wow first time seein me goin to such places-.-6 of us went for lunch while others went up to play,it took us 15mins just to decide wat to eat sub/long/mos.At last mos haahaa great, Brinz bought outside food then join us... vanilla ice cream with fried brownies yum yum... Haha thks lady...Then went up to arcade first i got nth to play, as usual...Then got bored proceed to land,
Kokway let me tried the audition all i could say I sux at it...I can't follow up always few beatS slower lookin at the animation standin there like a statue...I was like hello can u move??? Anw thks bro:)Then JiaHui let me try Left 4 dead...
Wooohooos man! That was scary man! Zombies from all over the places can jump can alot of stuffs... but one thing gross... Haha Jiahui was insultin us by callin our names while shootin the zombiessss.The fat one prime choice super gross lo... DISGUSTING!
WHen u r nervous on somethin u wouldn't know wat words will come out from ur mouth...I was almost... But thank God again...Lord, how this words r kept in my mind wash them out, cleanse me, search my heart,Lord.
Ppl says tt "Ppl take 3days to learn bad things, but take 3yrs to turn back."
For me"I take 3 secs to learn bad things and need dunno how many 3s to turn back..."
I can't always say n do nth, There's something for me to do. Lord father, show me UR way.

Today my left eye twitch alot.... Yea its alot...
Went IMM in the mornin to buy stuffs from giant ofr the pract of tabasco comp,
with HanWei, elton n Brinz(helper to help us carry thingsXP).... haha guys always gotta wait for the gals...
Brinz took so long...
Then didn't know tt we will meet so many of the others haha so happy then went to Mac for breakfast. Then off we go for some shoppin n discussion.
Darren came n meet us haha great.
Reach sch super early went in to kitchen super early just to prepare.
Then start... Was struggling kkz u do this u do tt.. Kkz i try this u try tt...-.-
HanWei super funny lo...
Then was tryin to cut poke thru the sotong plastic bag,
aim wrongly went straight into my thumb.... OOOHH AHHH!!!
Thanks remster for helpin me to bandage it up... N thks for ur concern:)
Got this numb numb uncomfortable feelin which makes me wanna press on my wound...
Then in the train was thinkin again... Kept quiet talkin to myself while listenin to both music n the hilarious gays n brinz...


Sunddenly ask myself am i a good fren?
No, I'm a failure... I'm nv be there for them when they needed someone first...
Is either i'm too blur or I dun care...
Useless me...
Loosing frens, tt I can't find a way to bring them back...
LORD, I'm calling out to U...
A.S.K is thirsty for ur pressence, Lord, help us plan where we can meet someday...
If u r willing...
L noticed the difference from the way we thot... The msg shocked me, stucked in this situation...

N for u I dunno leh,

I wanna build back this frenship.

U tried, i retreat, I tried u retreat. How is this goin to go on.
Once in a while, thank GOD, HE bring us back. But days ltr its gone... How sad can this be...
U know wats right yet follow the wrong... I'm left with sigh...speechless... Thot u'll stand for the rights... I think I'm wrong...
Lord, all I left is u...Thank U for showin me UR strength thru my weakness...
Show us the way...

Ytd have family gathering, thot its gonna be bored.
Cos its been some time I didn't see them,
for some valid reason(: TQ!!!!hahaha...
It always falls on Sats...
Anw yepps had buffet at some dark dark restuarants,
which make uncles and aunts can't see...lol
They shift their table n left us the teens haha
JiHao, XinYi, Javin n me.
We were tryin to stop Jav from eatin too much oh goodness...JAV!!!!
Then Nicholas the 2nd youngest came n join us haha he got lots of can't finish stories...
Can sleep los... nich, gotta teach u to say it short n funny hahas.
Daryl 2nd elders came hahas the whole table is filled with our non~stop laughters...
Haahaa thks to me which make them started laughin... then next was Jav haha laugh with no reason but yet we all still laugh... HAHA laugh at the question marks on our faces created by Daryl's cold cold joke... meant for adults...-.-
TT table is for teens jokes ok! hahas relax relax...

Today was great hehe I felt happy on the outside but in the very deep of me i wasn't feelin tt way. Thanks Kas for tt eeeewwwooooooahhh romantic msg...
N tt Brinz use my phone to msg Kas, now she is naggin over the phone...
For one last time i'm sayin I DUN FLIRT!
Is the girls come to me when i'm in DEYI! And now its diff alr...
All thks to Brinz la!!!! grrr......
Kas u wanna talk to my mom hahahahas....Xp Jatti n choli conversation....

I hope it'll get any better...
Pray tt the ending won't be like "rainbow connection"(Wu Chu Cai Hong)
Dancing alone... on a stage rather than with her partner. Cos of proud???
Lord, humble me pls... Knowin tt I'm not humbled enough.

This week cn say i was struggling with my confidence,
after ma'am saw the lack of confidence in me.
Thanks ma'am n all the chefS from CA...
Thanks for all of ur encouragementS n MotivationS...
U guys helped me ALOT. i'll try to climb up myself one day.
Esp many thanks to Brinz, Kokway(CODY/bro), Darren, Remster...
Thank GOD tt i know all of u... U all play an important part in my life.
Ytd went to play pool with Kokway n the rest.
Was fun at first when i tried learning from the PROS... KOKWAY,ANGIE,INDRA.
Shall admit tt I'm slow learnin all things... sigh speechless...
Then felt sian cos i still dunno how to play sigh... But thanls to CKW again for makin me laugh hahas. But aft answering Brinz call felt guilty and worried. SO sorry Brinz.
I can't be a good fren, for both incidence, I can't help u/ comfort u/ n many many more...
I'm so bad at this, I can't make this happen again.
LORD, I need u....
Thanks bro for reminding me tt HE is always there when I need HIM most.
Today was bored w/o binz, kokway,darren,remster.
But thanks tt Sherine n Angie was there hahas.
THE NARUTO CAR WAS COOL!!!lol...
Was please to meet Chef ERIC...